saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
two words...techno handjob
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I stole a fireplace last night.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Randomize
