Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
