the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
