Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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