i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
