I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I'm at about main and main street
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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