goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
