Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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