How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Randomize
