so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
