Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
He better not be in your backpack
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
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