yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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