k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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