brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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