i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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