I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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