Ambien. No doubt about it.
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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