C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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