we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
