I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
