Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
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