I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
As shirtless as possible
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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