I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
