Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
so let's talk penis.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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