his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
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