That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
