i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
