The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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