I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Randomize
