Need sex. Gaining weight.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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