sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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