I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize