and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
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