I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
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