All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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