I think scott just propositioned me for sex
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
i just google imaged poop.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Randomize
