what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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