im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
