You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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