We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
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You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
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In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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