Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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