I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
