okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
