Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Randomize
