I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
