you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Randomize
