I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
