Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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