You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Did I show you my penis last night?
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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