when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
