It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
