So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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